The Big Question

Question yourself. Post your own answer. Give to receive.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Two Hundred and Second Question


Is it really possible to remain friends with someone
after you've had a relationship with them?
Have you ever personally experienced this type of situation?

29 Comments:

  • At 9:47 AM, Blogger Ranea said…

    I think so if, I've done it. And were still close to this day.It unlikely to happen gut it possible.

     
  • At 9:47 AM, Blogger Fletch said…

    Yes most definitly...
    Having a relationship only brings people closer together. After the physical relationship has finished and if both people can see the whole picture, the deeper levels of trust etc. then why not...

    Just becasue you Love someone, doesnt mean you have to be with them.

    Ciao Ciao

     
  • At 9:53 AM, Blogger Pixie said…

    I think so, as long as you are both on the same page and can be adults about it.

     
  • At 10:07 AM, Blogger Kerry said…

    For me its impossible. If they are my ex, they are my ex for a reason.
    a) I decided for one reason or another they "werent the one"

    b) They for some reason ( I like to assume because they are insane ) decided I "wasnt the one".

    Exes are only good for two things, to look back on and realise how lucky you are not to be with them ( ok I live in denial), realise how much you have grown ( yes, im delusional too).

     
  • At 10:17 AM, Blogger JB said…

    I've never done it, but I think it can be possible. My ex-husband and I are on friendly terms, though he lives in England and I'm here in Texas. When he calls to talk to my daughter we always have the usual chit-chat. Our marriage and subsequent divorce, however, was extremely complicated and not like the usual situation. I deeply miss him as a friend, definitely.

     
  • At 10:32 AM, Blogger djmetronome said…

    I've done it before...One of my lasting friendships...and i'm really hoping to do it now...with my current ex...but, I still love her so it probably wont' work.
    :-)

     
  • At 10:48 AM, Blogger Robert said…

    Depends. Depends on how you were being treated at the time, and how you treated the other person during the relationship... and yet there are always more than 2 sides of things.

     
  • At 11:17 AM, Blogger nancy =) said…

    it is possible, but i think it is best to just move on...it's cool if you can move on with the relationship in good enuff standing so that if you happen to bump into each other in a restaurant or something it won't be awkward...

     
  • At 11:39 AM, Blogger ian g. said…

    No.

     
  • At 11:44 AM, Blogger ian g. said…

    PS
    Am I going mad or was there an entirely different question here earlier?

     
  • At 11:46 AM, Blogger Pandora said…

    Yes it is possible, though it completely depends on the two of you and how things end obviously. My last ex...I have no interest in being friends with. But the one before him, no problem.

     
  • At 1:51 PM, Blogger danielle said…

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

     
  • At 1:53 PM, Blogger danielle said…

    i have two serious relationship exs. the first one i dated for 5 years...from highschool to the end of our freshman year in college. for about 3 years after it was over we hardly talked. now we talk monthly to play catch up. we have the type of friendship that recounts memories and is fun to share over a good meal and a glass of wine.

    the second one, that's a different story. he ended up proposing to one of my closest girlfriends and we haven't really talked since. sure, there's the "how are you doing" surface chit chat crap...but i don't really count that. and it might sound sad, but i'm okay with it. my life is fulfilled without him.

    so, yes and no. it depends on the people and the situation.

     
  • At 2:09 PM, Blogger Pittchick said…

    I think it can be done, but it depends on whether both people want it to happen. I think it's a little harder to maintain the friendship after a relationship fizzled.

     
  • At 2:19 PM, Blogger "Angeldust" said…

    Hello Sublime
    Thank you for stopping by, and kind words left.
    The Universe brings about some rather interesting connections through a little casual “blog-hopping” (as I call it), doesn’t it?

    As for today’s question.
    I have made a “career” out of remaining friendly with my ex’s – almost started just ‘cause my mother thought it was something one does not do – poo-ti-do!
    However, I must say that I really liked the man I spent time with – dated, had serious relationships with and except for the odd - misguided soul?, I have been “fortunate” with man.
    Respect was high on our list at all times, so when our journeys need to take different paths, they still the same lovely man I first liked… but, not for us to be
    What I don’t do anymore is keep in touch on a regular basis – one must make room for the new to come.
    Have a sunny-full day
    =.a.=

    P.S. you are welcome to visit my new MischiefMusings.blogspot.com

     
  • At 3:48 PM, Blogger mini driver wannabe said…

    I have done it only short term. Eventually we just prt ways.

     
  • At 4:04 PM, Blogger alan said…

    If you see them everyday (ala work or something) perhaps not; if it's only occasionally then sure!

    alan

     
  • At 4:43 PM, Blogger Moonpie said…

    Not in my experience, it's too wierd for new partners,I don't think it's really fair but it's different you have had children together I should think, at least then you will always have something in common.

     
  • At 5:53 PM, Blogger Mind Sprite said…

    The only ex I am not still friends with is my ex husband, but he was a complete ass and I'm better off not talking to him. My current beau is also friends with all of his exes. I think it's possible if you are clear with your boundaries, still have mutual respect and affection and have no lingering romantic feelings. It doesn't work if one of the people is always hoping you'll get back together.

     
  • At 9:39 PM, Blogger Anne-Marie said…

    Possible, but difficult. Love is a friendship that has caught fire, but if you get burned, you don't want to go near the flame again.

    -AM

     
  • At 10:22 PM, Blogger art-sweet said…

    One of my closest friends is an ex.

     
  • At 5:48 AM, Blogger Coal Miner's Daughter said…

    I know it works. I was almost in an ex's wedding (they eloped instead).

    You just need a good chunk of time in between to make sure you are really over them and heal the wounds. If you try too soon it gets messy and painful. And well, if they have hurt you badly enough that you can't get over it...then I guess, no it won't work.

    -Jn

     
  • At 9:57 AM, Anonymous Victoria said…

    It's possible... Just hard. But it can be done.

     
  • At 12:52 PM, Blogger Robin said…

    In my circle, I notice that my straight friends rarely remain friends, but lesbians often remain friends after a break-up.

     
  • At 5:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Yes yes and yes. It'll take a while, but yes, you can still be friends. And I think the friendship will be even better than a normal friendship because you've survived fighting and hating each other.

     
  • At 8:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Nope.
    ~Dante~

     
  • At 4:41 PM, Blogger Alise said…

    NO. I've tried it many times, and I'm just too slutty. NO.

     
  • At 7:46 PM, Blogger House of Suz said…

    Oddly enough, I've slept with the two people I am closest to today. Nothing going on sexually with either now.

    Just found your blog and love it!

     
  • At 8:57 AM, Blogger Sphinx said…

    Yes, I'm friends with my exes. Not close friends, but friends nonetheless.

     

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